Next stage - getting busy!

We are now in the process of choosing a local agency to do our homestudy.  This should take 2-4 months to complete.  This will involve lots of paperwork, home visits, background checks, fingerprinting, as well as required reading and online classes.  The next few months we will be filling most of our free time with completing all of these requirements.

This process will be different from the process to adopt Kayla.  One of the ways this will be different is that we will be able to choose a child from a Bulgarian waiting children's list at any time during this process.  I find myself having to fight feelings of urgency to choose a child (there are not very many little boys available with the more minor special needs), guilt when I see some of the severely sick children we are not in a place to consider, and also fear that we will not know which child to say 'yes' to.  Please pray specifically that God will give us grace to wait if need be, as well as wisdom and peace when we do choose a child.

Bulgaria Adoption

So here we are again, starting another exciting adoption!  We have chosen to go with the country of Bulgaria; this is where God keeps directing our hearts.  There is great need for children with disabilities to be adopted and we are requesting a little boy, age 0-3, with minor/moderate special needs.  We will be looking at waiting children’s lists and praying that the Lord would grant us much wisdom as we wait and eventually choose a little boy.  The timeline is approximately anywhere from 10 months to 18 months.

Many of you know of the difficult adjustment Kayla has had, although we have not shared most of it on our blog.  Who could have imagined that a child so young, 9 months old when we brought her home, could have already been so deeply broken?  Rage, tantrums, defiance, and frustration characterized her for much of the first year after she joined our family.  There was very little progress with attachment and Kayla alternated from cold distancing to scratching and hitting during most interactions with either parent.  During one of her tantrums, I took her raging, angry little body into the other room and sat down with her.  I looked into her face and knew that she thought mommy was simply being mean.  My heart ached, and I realized she had no concept of how deeply I love her and desired her best.  I was reminded that it is with that kind of love that God loves us, only it is even deeper and perfect.  All I could do is tell her I love her.  With much love and prayer we have seen her grow into a delightful, happy little girl.  She still has a will of iron and has a quick temper, but these no longer define her or run her life.  Kayla has fully attached and runs to me for hugs, and every day, many times a day, tells me that she loves me.  We are coming up on 2 years with our little Kayla and thank God daily for the healing and wholeness that we are seeing in her life.

I mention Kayla’s story to explain what has brought us to the place of adopting again.  It breaks my heart when I think of what institutionalized children experience and what little hope they are given.  Our desire is to bring home a child that needs a family, a child that can grow up learning about the Lord and be loved.  Please pray for us as we continue down this road.  There is risk in what we are doing, and there will be difficult days ahead, but the desire of our hearts is to rescue and love a needy child.

Changes

We're tweaking the blog a little. Notice anything different in the Title?

Valentine's Day Heart

Day hike

Kayla stopped suddenly on the muddy trail and started screaming because she could not move her feet. Laughing, we picked her up but underestimated the suction from the mud, Kayla was lifted off the ground, but her boots remained. Below is Kayla's reaction to finding her boots still in the mud instead of on her feet.

This was Lana's face after she slid into a mud puddle and soaked her pants. We headed back to the van right away, but were grateful for the chance to get out on a truly beautiful Saturday.